Thirtysomething dating twenty

If I look back to where I was in my early to mid-twenties, I was a completely different person.My communication with my then-boyfriend was terrible, as was his, and our relationship became toxic because neither of us were saying what we really felt.Probably, because with age comes more years to grow and learn tough lessons from this thing we call life.But despite these perks, the allure of the younger man has nothing to do with age at all.“It’s not just then that they don’t have a girlfriend, they don’t have any guys. Being single when your friends are single is amazing, but it’s no fun to go out alone.”“Men when they are 28 or 30, in that pre-adulthood stage, have less consciousness that their life is in a temporary arrangement,” said Kay Hymowitz, author of Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men into Boys.But it’s not only about losing all their bros to matrimony and having no one to hit the bars with on Saturday night; marriage and parenthood, despite clichés of the commitment-phobic bachelor, are important life goals for men, particularly once they reach their mid-thirties.It sounds like this: “If I met the girl today, I’d be 45 when my son or daughter goes to kindergarten.” Now, as it turns out, men are fretting about their closing window to meet someone and have kids.Circa 2014, there are an unprecedented number of single, educated men in their thirties—the medium age for a first marriage is as high as 32 in the District of Columbia, trailed by 30 in New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, and Massachusetts, according to census data.

Men, too, are concerned about the lack of options as they get older, falling behind their peer group and, now, their biological clock, brought on by a rash of new research and attention to the health risks of older fatherhood.“I see the vast majority of my single guy friends wishing they weren’t,” said Ben Lerer, 32, founder of Thrillist Media Group, an e-commerce site focused on young men.

He is so fearful of being alone,” said Lerer, who tied the knot at 28.

Mangst sets in, according to Lerer, when all their other male friends get married.

Children, they'd got now, demanding jobs, approach of middle-age, gloom!

And it's also used as a noun, as I just did - 'the thirty-somethings'.

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You can follow her up-to-the minute advice and insight on Twitter at @jen_kirsch.

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